Golden Globes 2024: The Good, the Bad & the Unfunny

Preview:

• The 2024 Golden Globes were far from sparkling.
• Host Jo Koy struck out with his monologue.
• A few historic wins were the bright spots.

2024 was supposed to be the year that the Golden Globes moved on. Detached from the old Hollywood Foreign Press Association (yet now run by possibly an even shadier for-profit corporation), it was designed to make up for a tarnished history that saw the awards get dumped by previous network NBC and chart a bright new future.

Yet on the evidence of the ceremony itself, it couldn’t recover past glories (even if those were mostly the results of the previous organization’s star-happy focus). There was the requisite assortment of big names (your Leonardo DiCaprio, your Martin Scorsese, your Christopher Nolan) but the whole thing came across as less Golden than bronze.

Let’s break it down…

Off To a Bad Start

Jo Koy hosts the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Comedian Jo Koy (who film fans might know outside of his stand-up career for last year’s ‘Easter Sunday’) stumbled out of the gate by quipping that he only got the gig a few days ago (it’s true that a number of more recognizable names passed) and blaming his writers for any unfunny jokes. Not a good look.

A dig at Taylor Swift’s new NFL relationship didn’t go over well either –– with the singing superstar visibly unimpressed when the camera cut to her.

He went on to offer some more visibly uninspired cracks at Barry Keoghan’s genitals in ‘Saltburn’ and Barbie’s breasts, which mostly had the audience cringing. We don’t expect him to be invited back.

Here’s what Koy said the following morning to ‘Good Morning America’:

“I had fun. It was a moment that I’ll always remember. It’s a tough room. It was a hard job, I’m not going to lie…I’d be lying if [I said] it doesn’t hurt. I hit a moment there where I was like, ‘Ah.’ Hosting is just a tough gig. Yes, I’m a stand-up comic but that hosting position it’s a different style. I kind of went in and did the writer’s thing. We had 10 days to write this monologue. It was a crash course. I feel bad, but I got to still say I loved what I did. The Taylor [Swift] one was just a little flat…It was a weird joke, I guess. But it was more on the NFL, I was trying to make fun of the NFL using cutaways and how the Globes didn’t have to do that. So it was more of a jab toward the NFL. But it just didn’t come out that way.”

Related Article: ‘Oppenheimer’, ‘Barbie’ and ‘Poor Things’ Win at the 2024 Golden Globes

Kieran Culkin’s Pedro Pascal jab

Kieran Culkin at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

One of the more viral –– and genuinely funny –– moments came as ‘Succession’ began to win the majority of the TV awards (that series and ‘The Bear’s near-dominance one of the entirely un-shocking elements of the ceremony). Kieran Culkin, who took the stage after winning Male Actor in a Drama Series, also took the occasion to throw a good-hearted jab the way of Pedro Pascal, who was nominated in the same category.

After a heartfelt celebration of finally nabbing the award, Culkin went full Roman Roy for a moment: “Suck it, Pedro…”

Pascal’s reaction –– a comedic combo that went from laughing to fake tears, is already a meme.

Dull Spiel

(L to R) Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Award shows are rarely known for sparkling words when it comes to presenters. Celebrities show up on the stage, read some boring copy celebrating the creativity of whoever and then throw it to a clip package of nominees.

This year’s Globes were no exception, with largely perfunctory pre-announcement banter that barely rose to the level of competence.

A few moments peeked through the mush –– ‘Across the Spider-Verse’ trio Daniel Kaluuya, Hailee Steinfeld and Shameik Moore delivered a funny riff on an intro penned by executives instead of writers, to highlight the need for creatives in the wake of the strikes. And Kristen Wiig and Will Ferrell let the music take them in a skit that generated more laughs.

Jennifer Lawrence threatens to leave

Jennifer Lawrence arrives on the red carpet at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Todd Williamson/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Jennifer Lawrence, who has been a reliably funny awards presence in the past, offered another this time. When she was shown during the nominees section for Best Actress, Motion Picture Comedy or Musical, she mouthed, “if I don’t win, I’m leaving!”

Emma Stone won. But Lawrence stuck around.

Emma Stone at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

A cash grab/kudos award misfires

(L to R) Selena Gomez and Taylor Swift at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Todd Williamson/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Possibly the biggest mistake even before the show was the blatant attempt to have Taylor Swift attend by nominating her ‘Eras Tour’ concert film in the new Cinematic and Box Office Achievement category.

It worked in that she showed (only to seem insulted, see above) and then box office behemoth ‘Barbie’ scored the award anyway, one of only a couple it took home on the night.

Real Highlights?

Lily Gladstone at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

If there were true highlights, it was in terms of representation –– Lily Gladstone won for her role in ‘Killers of the Flower Moon’ and celebrated the victory for Native Americans while also offering a sweet shout-out to her mother, who had accompanied her to the event.

Likewise, Ali Wong became the first Asian woman to win Best Actress In A Limited Series or TV Movie (which feels a little bit forced, but is progress nonetheless) for ‘Beef’, which also saw her co-star Steven Yeun win alongside the show.

Ali Wong at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

And Christopher Nolan appeared genuinely touched to have won his first directing Globe for ‘Oppenheimer’ (one of a parade the movie scored in an unsurprising run).

The ceremony itself at least scored on the ratings front –– its airing on CBS and Paramount+ saw the numbers jump from last year’s NBC/Peacock appearance –– and it counts as the most-watched Globes since 2020. But even that seems a useless metric, since the 2021 event was banished to YouTube and doesn’t even really count for ratings.

Can the Globes become relevant again? That’s the big question for now. On the evidence of last night, the answer is a big old “maybe”.

(L to R) Oprah Winfrey and Steven Speilberg at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Todd Williamson/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

(L to R) Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Todd Williamson/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Taylor Swift at the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards, airing live from the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, California on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 8 PM ET/5 PM PT, on CBS and streaming on Paramount+. Photo: Francis Specker/CBS ©2024 CBS Broadcasting, Inc. All Rights Reserved.