Painted grass, banned words and $2 sandwiches: Inside the perfectly weird world of The Masters

The Masters is the youngest of golf’s four majors at a sprightly 88-years.

And yet it is overflowing with tradition at every corner, a curious relic of a bygone era that stands alone in the modern hyper-commercial sporting world.

Augusta National is very much like Wimbledon on steroids – heritage and history combined with strict and sometimes draconian rules, served up in a picture-perfect setting.

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In short, there’s nothing quite like it, which is partly why tens of thousands of fans cross their fingers that they’ll be selected in the annual ticket lottery.

Not that you can call them fans – Augusta requires them to be called ‘patrons’, a lesson broadcaster Jack Whitaker learned the hard way when he copped a six-year ban for describing the gallery as a ‘mob’ in 1966.

It’s just one of the weird and wonderful quirks of a unique tournament.

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THE RULES

No phones are allowed – except the payphones, which despite their name are provided free of charge by Augusta National. Other electronic device are also strictly prohibited. Cameras, too, are a no-no, but only on tournament days.

Patrons can only ask for autographs at one specific site near the practice area.

Security is on strict alert for spectators (sorry, patrons) shouting out, with a long list of phrases banned. In 2018, one list was leaked – and it included seemingly innocuous phrases like “To infinity and beyond” or “you the man”.

Broadcasters, too, have strict rules about what words they can say. Besides calling the gallery ‘patrons’, there are plenty of other restrictions. Miss the fairway and players are in the ‘second cut’, not the ‘rough’. The course has ‘bunkers’, not sand traps. There’s a ‘first nine’ and ‘second nine’, not a front nine and a back nine – that rule allegedly brought in because the term ‘back nine’ might remind someone of a backside. Seriously.

Patrons cannot lie down on the grass but can bring a chair – but only if it’s a folded one with no armrests. And if you want to get to a prime viewing location, you better walk: running is banned.

Break any of these rules, and you’ll be punted immediately – and likely never allowed to return to Augusta National.

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THE FOOD

Despite the strict rules, there are many reasons why fans love the Masters – including the food.

The famous pimento cheese sandwich costs just $1.50 USD, as does an egg salad sandwich. The iconic Georgia peach ice cream sandwich is $3 – though that’s gone up this year from $2.50 last tournament. Beers have gone up a dollar, but are still just $6 – including a wheat ale called Crow’s Nest that is exclusively brewed for the tournament.

The sandwiches, cups, and all merchandise sold is packaged in green wrapping. It means that when the tournament is televised, all food and drinks are coloured the same as the grass.

Appearances are everything at Augusta.

THE COURSE

Speaking of the grass, the course sometimes uses paint to ensure that any brown areas of the Bermuda turf are perfectly matched to the rest of the course.

Former greenkeeper Andy Stranger once told National Club Golfer: “You will get weak spots, bits that are in the shade we will be working on.

“Anything that can be picked up on camera will be painted green.”

There is one area of fake turf on the course – across the iconic and picturesque Hogan Bridge that takes players to the green on the 12th hole.

When it comes to ensuring the course is in perfect condition, there has long been a rumour that Augusta National dyes the water in the ponds across the course – given the crystal-clear reflections off the dark-coloured water. In 1996, a Golf Digest journalist took a sample of water from the 15th hole and tested it, discovering it contained a kind of blue food dye. Augusta National, of course, refuses to confirm whether dye is still used.

The beautiful white sand in the bunkers, too, isn’t as it seems – it’s actually a type of quartz that comes from the Spruce Pine mining district in North Carolina.

Professor Drew Coleman once explained: “That’s why the bunkers are so white.

“Spruce Pine quartz is the best in the world, and the quartz created from the feldspar mining process is so white and pure.”

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Augusta National sprawls over 365 acres, with the club having bought around 100 neighbouring properties since 2000. But one neighbour famously refuses to sell, despite regularly being offered millions of dollars by the club. That house now sits near to a large car park on the outskirts of the course.

It’s not the only interesting building at Augusta National – one of the many white cabins on the course used to house former US President Dwight Eisenhower, a member of Augusta. His cabin had a basement used by the Secret Service whenever he visited the club.

He’s not the only President to have played at Augusta. President Ronald Reagan went there in October 1983, when a man wielding a gun took several hostages in the pro shop, demanding to speak to the President. Reagan tried to speak to the man over the phone, and the hostages were eventually released.

THE MEMBERSHIP

Being a US President helps if you want to become a member of one of golf’s most prestigious clubs. Other than that, it’s mostly a case of wishing. Membership is invite-only, and those who ask – or publicly state they would like to be a member – are put right back down the list of potential invitees. It took until 1990 for an African American to become one of the 300-or-so members (Augusta National doesn’t reveal the specific number), and 2012 for a woman to become a member.

Even Masters winners don’t automatically get membership, but they do get the iconic green jacket. That said, winners are allowed to wear their green jacket outside Augusta only for a year after their triumph. After that, their jacket is kept at the club.

THE PLANTS

Augusta National is one of the most well-groomed, immaculately curated courses in the world. There are approximately 80,000 plants with around 350 varieties in all. The trees are all deliberately cut so they lean inwards, seemingly narrowing the fairways.

Most recognisable of the plants are the azaleas, those stunning swathe of red, pink and purple that line the course. More than 30 varieties are on display around the course, especially the 13th hole, appropriately named Azaelea – which has over 1,000 of the bushes.

One of the greatest myths about Augusta – and there are many – is that the azaleas are packed in ice to ensure that their short two or three-week window of blooming – occurs perfectly come tournament time. It has since been debunked.

There are also thousands of well-trimmed trees.

But one stands apart: a single palm tree, a curious oddity among the thousands of Georgia pines. Each hole is named after a plant or flower, and the par-three fourth hole was once named ‘palm’.

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But the grove of palm trees that once lined the right side of the hole died off in a winter freeze decades ago – bar one. The hole was renamed to a different plant, and the single palm tree became hidden behind a mass of bamboo. It became something of a secret, until the fifth hole was lengthened in 2019. The course tweaks saw the bamboo cut down – and suddenly the single palm was on display for all the world to see.

THE ANIMALS… OR LACK OF

A large fence around the property means there’s a remarkable lack of animals on the course. A deer has reportedly been spotted once in the club’s history, while you’ll never see squirrels or the like. Even bugs are rare.

One of the great mysteries around Augusta is the urban legend that broadcasts of the Masters have used fake bird noises.

Many journalists have investigated this without definite answers, but in 2001 Augusta National took the rare step of declaring no fake noises were used. Yet birds are rarely seen at the club despite the thousands of trees and flowers.

There is, however, at least some animals in Augusta – fish. The ponds and creeks around the course hold bream and bass, or at least did when President Eisenhower was around. He reportedly used to fish at the course, while other snippets of fishing stories have been revealed down the years.

A former caddie at the course, Tripp Bowden, wrote in his memoir that Augusta National was a “fishing haven”.

“The caddies loved to fish there,” Bowden wrote.

Trying to fish there these days would seem to be a bad idea, given Augusta National’s brutal history of punishing those who break their strict rules.

THE RULE-BREAKERS

In 1994, TV analyst Gary McCord was permanently banned by Augusta National for describing the 17th green – live on air – as playing so quickly that it looked as though it had been “bikini waxed”. He also joked that there were “body bags” of golfers who had been victimised by the course hidden behind the green. He would work for CBS until 2019 – but was never allowed to cover the Masters again.

He’s not the only one to cop a ban for breaking the rules.

In 2021, Wayne Player, son of golf legend Gary Player, held up a branded sleeve of golf balls on TV during the Honorary Starters ceremony. That year, the Masters were paying tribute to Lee Elder, the first black man to compete in the tournament.

Wayne was promptly kicked out and received a lifetime ban.

In 2012, respected golf writer Alan Shipnuck walked into the iconic Butler Cabin just as Bubba Watson was being presented with his green jacket for winning the tournament. Only the official broadcaster is allowed to view the special ceremony – and Shipnuck copped a one-year ban from Augusta National.

Also in 2012, one fan tried to grab a cup of sand as a unique memento. The patron, Clayton Barker, ducked under a rope and went to a bunker at the 10th hole to fill up a cup – only to be arrested quickly. He was banned for life and spent $20,000 on legal fees.

And in 2011, a young Ricky Fowler – back then with his long hair and outlandish style – turned up to a press conference wearing a cap facing backwards. He was told to turn it around, and tried to explain his look was to help people see his face. Augusta National officials were having none of it – and lucky for Fowler, he caught on quickly enough.

As Fowler learned, Augusta is a special place – so long as you follow the rules.